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First Dates 101

There can be few things as exciting as the first date. The newness, the uncertainty, and the sheer force of attraction…the possibilities are immense. It can prove to be the stepping stone to a fledgling romance, or a nightmare which can’t end sooner. And let’s be honest. The first date is a nerve-wrecking situation. What to do on the date? Where to go? What to wear? Most importantly, what are we going to talk about?

When deciding on the first date, most people go either for a meal or a movie. While it is tried and tested, there are quite a few more imaginative ideas out there. On an ideal first date, the conversation ought to flow. Yet there has to be enough distraction so that you are not under pressure to talk continuously.

The choice of the place has obviously got a lot to do about with the interests of the people involved. You don’t want to take an artsy type of a girl to play golf. And an outdoorsy guy would get bored to death in a museum.

Be yourself on the first date!

Let’s take a look at some ideas.

For the sporting types, bowling or going to the driving range might be a casual yet fun way to start. Beer, pizza, and friendly competition gives you enough to break the ice and be relaxed. And if you guys are having a good time, chances are you would get a second date!

Remember that the focus is on trying something off the beaten track—a novel experience that stays in the memory for long. Going to the theatre is any day a tad classier than the movies. You want to go early, chat during intermission, and discuss performances over coffee afterward.

Couple listening to music

For music fans, a soft melodious performance at a small venue is ideal. You don’t want blaring music. No head-banging heavy metal stuff. But something that gives you an opportunity to dance and show off your moves!

When out there, do not hesitate to ask questions. Do share your experiences as well, for it is a two-way game. Focus on what you felt rather than what you achieved. You have to discover a common ground without being the ‘investigative’ types. The common bond that you might find could be trivial; you may be eating the same brand of breakfast cereal; but it is invaluable as it ‘connects’ you the first day itself.

Items of common knowledge like the new movie or the latest iPad are fair talking points. Grab the opportunities that a situation presents. If you’re at Starbucks, you might want to ask his opinion on the pumpkin latte! But whatever you do, stay away from discussing the weather—it’s cliche and dated.

Don’t be scared of silence. No one in his right mind talks every second. Also it is a good idea to keep the first date short. If you are having a nightmare of a time, it allows you to walk away quickly.

Awkward First Date

Keeping a first date short works as a safety precaution too. In these times when date rapes and violence are frequent, one cannot be too careful.

Also if you are into online dating, go only for reputable services. There are fewer chances that false profiles have slipped through verification. Even then, always pay attention to the language that they use to communicate before agreeing to go on the date.

On the first date, your gut feeling is your best friend. If you feel something is not right, don’t hang around. Even when things have gone well, for women it is generally a good idea to not leave with him. There would most surely be other occasions for that.  As a thumb rule it is better to meet in public places, with lots of people around, at least the few times. And on late night dates, keep a close watch on the alcohol intake. Both yours and your partner’s. It is easy to lose control with alcohol; it impairs judgement and hence is a big no-no the first time round.

Generally single parents keep their children away in the initial encounters and that is the right thing to do. No use dealing with complicated emotions when there is so much uncertainty involved.

It is difficult to rival the excitement of the first date. Mixed with the right amount of caution and planning, it can be a fabulous experience. Make your first dates more enjoyable and fun using the tips and suggestions mentioned here!

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